Blog with a message

Humbled but thank you so very much ❤️🏹

Helen Sharpe Blog with a message, News

I am aware that this year alone I have been nominated for awards with Archery GB, This Girl Can, Northamptonshire Sport and North Northamptonshire Council, I was privileged to be awarded a Platinum Champion Award by the Royal Voluntary Service in honour of the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee.

I am blessed that people see what I do, what I give and that they take the time to nominate me. This year is not any different to previous years, I receive notifications that I have been nominated for awards or recognition most years. 

Whilst it’s nice to be recognised by the people that choose who gets these awards I am actually always more interested to know who took the time, what did the say, what did I do that they felt was important enough that they would take the time to write it in a nomination, because if I can I like to thank them. 

I don’t always get to find out, for this award I had to fill in a request form, they then contacted the nominator for permission – well today I am blown away, I didn’t get one! I got 5 and not all under the same category!!

I have had details shared from each nomination, it’s not just archery, it’s about working for inclusion, it’s about the time I put in for awareness of epilepsy and the impact on my son and our amazing purple family, it’s work I have and do with Age Uk, NHS, and families who need support. 2 of them have included a lot of what I have done in the last 31 years!! 

Wow, just wow 😮 

It amazes me to read about how people see me. 

I started volunteering at the age of 16. 

At the age of 20 I went through something horrific and I promised myself I would put my life to good use and use it to help others, with no real idea of what that promise meant as I sent it out into the ether.

I am often asked why I give what I do, what do I get out of the hours I put in? 

Well I get to keep that promise to myself, I get to make a difference for others in lots of small ways and it’s different things to different people. 

But when I see someone smile, if someone takes the time to share what I meant, what I have given them or helped them to achieve,it helps me move forward on the days it doesn’t feel like I am achieving anything. It is a privilege to be allowed to take any small part in someone’s life and do any of the things that I have done these 31 years. I struggle to explain it in an answer when asked – why do you do this? 

It’s too big and it’s wrapped up in too many things. 

This week I had someone take the time to ask if I would sit and listen as they told me what they have seen me achieve and how proud of me they are, I have no idea how to answer that, at all. The details they shared – I cried and I got the biggest hugs, maybe, just maybe I am doing ok in my own small way. 

I know what a difference some people have shared with me that my helping them with arrows, sharing them, helping them stay, has made. 

I often get asked about being a coach – no I think my role as cheerleader and encourager are far more important, yes I know that some think those skills belong to a coach too! 

Thank you to those who have celebrated my news this week that I am starting my training as a disability sports coach and learning about adaptive sports. It’s exciting already that some of those working with me for archery are already considering how we can expand our combined offered sports.

I will keep spending my time volunteering and giving my time to keep my promise. 

Integr8Archery and my hybrid club are certainly a big part in enabling me to be able to do that and to allow me to work with others without ever loosing me again.

Thank you to all of those who took the time to message me this week, never do I take your support for granted. 

It’s Saturday again!! Another busy week but a Saturday repost ☕️

Helen Sharpe Blog with a message, Health, Re-published blogs

This has been a busy week and I have a couple of things to share, especially news that I received yesterday, but I will cover all of that in Tuesday’s end of week blog.

The last few weeks have been re-posted blogs after someone asked if I could share them as they had heard about them from another archer. This one seems especially appropriate as we are moving indoors and this was originally posted towards the end of the last indoor season. So, grab a brew and have a read. A quick thank you to the archers who have reached out in the 8 months following this too, I know how hard it is to talk to someone about the changes that we fear, thank you for trusting me.

SOMEONE ELSE’S PERSPECTIVE

Originally Published 25th February 2022 by Aim4Sport.

Firstly, read all of this if you are going to read it! 

Last year I wrote about my issues with moving to seated to continue shooting. 

The response to that has blown me away, thank you to everyone who responded but especially to 5 people who reached out. Each with different issues, some were moving to seated, some a change in bow styles, but all at a point where it was to change or quit? 

Each with similar issues around the changes but chatting and sharing and a couple of archers who really let me help, we are all still shooting. That’s not to say some days are not still a struggle as we adapt to the changes. 

So, what have I learned in the last year following that blog? 

That I am not the only one struggling, that sharing your story can help others in ways you didn’t expect. 

But – also? 

I have always enjoyed competing, it’s never about anything other than competing against myself. I enjoy the company of other archers and I hope each achieve their own goals, but their outcome does not effect mine, because I am not competing against them.

So with this in mind, summer 2021 was a return to competition for many, opening back up still dealing with the pandemic. 

For me, trying to come to terms with taking the shooting stool to places and with people I don’t know, unsure how I would be received. 

My team – coach, Dave Leader and physio, Benjamin Horner – always there, when I wobble and need a word. It’s my right to shoot and we are claiming it. My club, Aim4sport AC supporting the change.

Not everyone is open to those who make the shooting line awkward, require some accommodation, but my aim when I applied to become an Archery GB ambassador was to push inclusion and I have worked hard to ensure that disability archers are not excluded, so why is it harder to push for yourself than for others? Admit it, it is for most of us! 

Some of the toughest opposition I have faced has been from entirely unexpected sources, those you’d expect to support me. 

I have had an amazing team of people prepared to work as agents for me, a role I have done for many over the last 5 years, wheelchair archers, VI archers, world transplant games! 

It took one of those archers who I had agented for, to give me firm words to have me accept it was ok to ask for help, that I am not a burden despite the words of some. 

So off I went, into the outdoor season, sometimes with an agent, sometimes not!! But determined that I would see only my aim to get that elusive first classification that had been so close but eluded me for 3 years as my body gave into the pain. 

I chose the first shoot out of county very carefully. 

Guildford Archery Club is somewhere I have enjoyed shooting and watching my children shoot, perfect. Or so I thought!!!! (My mistake not theirs)! 

I arrived the night before to realise I had left Bert (the shooting stool at home)! 

I messaged the TO and was entirely overwhelmed the following morning to arrive and find they had me a stool waiting!!!!! Wow! A little emotional and hugging the work party who were proving that I had absolutely made the right choice in my first competition out of county with no agent! 

It didn’t go so well, I couldn’t finish, though it looks very similar this taught me that all of that time working with my engineers to get my stool set for me was worth it. They are not all the same.

A learning experience so definitely no regrets. 

I was encouraged by this to go out and get on with it. 

Often finding kindness but also often finding myself sat in the very same place. Right at the end, on the right of the shooting line. Lonely, to be truthful but happy to be shooting and this is perhaps the price to pay to continue with my sport? 

The outdoors ended and the move indoors which I hate every year! New bow to celebrate getting that first classification finally!!!!! 

For a variety of reasons I haven’t managed many indoor shoots but I am booking in and trying to aim for the target I set myself. 

The indoors seems to make availability of agents less? 

So key to this is being brave enough to ask for help.

Then I struggled at a competition with my mental health, and as the work party paid attention to me because they knew I was struggling they suddenly noticed what no one ever does! 

I am on the far right of the line again, literally my nose against the brick wall for a double Portsmouth. 

What happened next however is what is most important. A conversation that they have never seen what happens, knowing they have seen it at theirs and other tournament venues but never thinking of the impact of what is happening on the archer! 

Apologies, it’s ok – it really is, or is it? 

Most of us just feel grateful that we are welcomed, that we are accepted, as a burden as we are often told and you make space for us on the line! 

But I can say that their reaction and how talking to me, talking to the judges about practicalities and ways to move us whilst meeting all the needs of everyone, means that going forward anyone seated at Archers of Raunds will be less isolated and definitely included in the shooting line. 

It also opened up an entire conversation around how we sometimes look at the easy fix but is it the most appropriate fix for the person you are trying to help, will they ask if they need more? 

Can you look at what you do and say did you just do enough or did you put a little more thought into what the individual might need? 

Did you accommodate them or did you actually welcome and include them? 

I am not asking for you to make people feel special, just considered. I also know that some archers like the very end so they can focus the mind and shut everyone out. 

All I am asking you to question is how do you feel when you look at the line, how might you be accommodating everyone. 

I know that this will annoy some, those same people who have tried to tell me I have no right to shoot if I cannot stand or if I cannot collect my own arrows. We are, after all, entitled to our own opinion, but if we can make people slightly more welcome in our sport surely it’s worth just stopping to think for a moment? 

Next in the series, following on from last weeks blog, around health and change.

Helen Sharpe Blog with a message, Event recap, Health, Re-published blogs

Last week’s republished blog was around the changes created by my physical health and the pain it creates, the decision to continue to shoot or quit. This week is around the battles my mental health can create and sees a republish of a blog that I wrote and was first published by Aim4Sport on the 19th February 2022.

This seems particularly important as I have rounded off my outdoor season with a shoot for the county today and I have reflected on my personal social media how the first competition of the outdoor season saw me cry through three dozen arrows as I battled with the idea of loosing my sport completely, had a rollercoaster of emotion, successes and failures but I am reaching the end of the season in a different mind set to how I started.

So, I again, invite you to grab a cuppa and read this from earlier in the year:

MAYBE THE BIGGEST SUCCESS WAS JUST LEAVING THE HOUSE?

Published 19th February 2022

Right now life isn’t easy, there are a long list of things happening and I am waiting on tests and results on top of all of that. 
I haven’t been able to shoot properly after upsetting my back, literally 3 weeks ago today I couldn’t put my foot flat to the floor and I am blessed that my physio is also my friend and that my coach is my best friend because that is what it took to get me through that particular evening. 
So today was going to be my first real competition with Calliope (my new bow). Booked weeks ago and long before all of the things that have hit to add to the usual struggles.

I had finally managed to get my first class badge with the 2021 outdoor season – 3 years in the making and hard earned. 
So I came to the outdoor season with a goal and a new bow! 

Tried a frostbite on Boxing Day and couldn’t finish, then the back!!! 


Had a couple of issues leading up to this week, like sitting crying with my laptop because I could not press the on button and having to call the office to admit that my mental health had tanked. 
Sunday morning arrived and I love competition, I am only shooting against myself and never have an expectation of the actual event itself. 
But today it was tough, really tough, for a variety of reasons. Still struggling with the concept of sitting to shoot some days, because no matter how much support you have, some days the voices who are trying to push you down are louder.

No you can’t see what is wrong with me, no you have no right to ask or to share your opinion of me, but some feel it’s ok to tell you if you can’t stand you shouldn’t be shooting. 

So, feeling vulnerable and having a rough week, I discover my agent is not joining me. 


Why am I trying? Why am I fighting, surely just quitting would be easier!! 


But I have people in my life who know how I would view that later if I gave in!! 
So with some encouragement I took a deep breath and left the house, not easy and I have, in the past, spent weeks/months in the house unable to step outside so never underestimate the effort it may have taken to step over the threshold and go outside.


By the time I arrived I was sobbing, tears streaming down my face, but I knew there were people inside that range who would support me, and all the things in my head trying to tell me to go home would be wrong if I could just get out of the car. 
So I walked in and indeed there were people, archers who don’t need information but I just reached out and said I need your help, I need to shoot today to allow me to continue tomorrow or that may be the end of my shooting for good.

And help they did with no information, people who knew me, people who didn’t, getting me and my kit in, set up and onto the line. Three different agents over 2 sessions. 
Pretty? Not at all!! 
Though there were a lot of photos taken so I will see if I looked like I might have vaguely had a clue how to shoot! 
Scores? Who cares? First competition with a new bow, no agent and overwhelming anxiety.


I came home with 2 silver medals for the single and the double rounds but they are more like medals for surviving the day. 
I cannot thank the people who got me through today enough and I look forward to returning to the same venue in 6 weeks to shoot again, hopefully with a smile on my face. 
But also, from my day, came learning. 
A club who saw me and the issues and reached out to ask some questions about the stool and how I felt and a realisation that actually they have never really taken into account some elements around seated archers, so a conversation with the judges and some new things in place to allow them to support anyone who shoots with them to be in the most comfortable environment that they can be.


It makes a difference to know a club welcomes anyone and will work with them to get things right if they realise they can improve. 
So on a day when my biggest achievement was leaving the house and not letting the voices in my head beat me and take away my sport, a positive experience for us all and one that will hopefully help others in the future. 
My point? Be kind, always kind because you never know what someone went through just to be stood in the room with you.

AUTHOR ARCHIVES: HELEN SHARPE

Enough! Sorry but if you need Aim4Sport contact Aim4Sport.

Helen Sharpe Announcement, Blog with a message

I have spent 6 months answering questions on ranges, at Lilleshall, emails, texts, messages on many platforms. I answered what I could, whilst I could and now repeatedly reply to the same people that I cannot answer your questions, I do not have the answers.
The shop and the training centre are closed, you may still have outstanding matters – I cannot help. The business is still there – I have never been part of it, you may not be getting answers, I cannot get them either.

In fact you are much more likely to get answers than me, I am blocked on every communication platform.

I also have things I need, and so much information I need to give, but I cannot.

Yes there was so much being planned, yes some of you were going to be a part of those things.

If you have been reading here you know I have kept some of my projects, yes they had been collaborating with me, now they are not. You will know that I also had to leave some of my projects behind, along with work I had done in collaborating on theirs. Yes, some of those projects had been tied together to create amazing things and I have had to pull my work out of that.

I passionately believed in what we would achieve and what was planned from May to October would have showcased it all. I have apologised to every single person who I have had to cancel plans on, who I have had to disappoint.

You can work with me, of course you can, stop asking if I have walked away from everyone – look! Here on this website!

I cannot however, help you any further with anything in regards to aim4sport, either the business or the club.

You need to contact them, if I cannot get my own answers I certainly cannot get yours.

I did not create the issues, I am sorry that they are there for every single one of you.

Please now stop messaging me in regards to Aim4Sport, the impact on my mental health in the last 11 months has been significant and I am incredibly grateful to the circle that has formed around me since January to get me through everything so far, but I need you to stop with the messages about Aim4sport, the business and the club, the impact those messages and my inability to resolve matters for you is incredibly detrimental to my continued healing.

I am sorry to everyone of you who thinks I have failed you, I did not walk away. I did not cause any of this and if I could make it right for all of you I would.

Kindest regards and well wishes as we each continue to make a difference through the power of the sport we love.

Helen

15 weeks, the question that everyone keeps asking at the moment?

Helen Sharpe Blog with a message, weekly update

Lots of meetings this week, with new groups and new plans but the latest club committee meeting saw dots on i’s and crosses on t’s – I have definitely chosen a great team and I am thankful they have agreed to run a club with me, certainly not something any of us were planning at the beginning of the year I am sure.

So the most asked questioned in the last 2 weeks is why did I choose social enterprise, community interest club over charity?

That’s easy.

Having been involved in the work of more than one charity and spending months working towards launching another, what I am aware of is how goals can be changed and how this can change how the money is used, all legally and no issues, but what was the original goal and did the donations that resulted come knowing that things might change? Would the same donation be made if the new goal had been clear?

I have been told often that I think in black and white and that I do not see grey (hilarious considering who has thrown that at me most and the grey I displayed there, but that’s a story for another day).

In order to be accepted as a Community Interest Company I had to complete paperwork.

My aim is to run grassroots projects for archery and bring sports to groups and individuals who do not know how to access it. Easy to explain and show evidence of how this has changed lives and helps individuals and communities – I have been doing it for 6 years. This might be one off sessions, a number of sessions or creating a group that is entirely self sustaining and supporting them from planning, setting up and ongoing mentoring. Where appropriate helping them source and obtain funding.

This will be done in a not for profit manner, with very little money going through the business. As with the 6 grants that I had helped clubs and groups obtain prior to setting up Integr8archery those monies go straight to the group who we applied on behalf of.

My costs? Will always be very minimal and again have been set out clearly to ensure anything that does come in is spent on projects. My two main expenses are petrol and storage costs, the kit has to live somewhere and I am grateful that Lok n Store gave me a deal to help keep the cost as low as I could.
Yes you can make a donation and this will help cover costs and also anything surplus will be spent on projects and will be clearly shown in the accounts verified by my amazing auditor at the end of each business year.

So, what does all of that mean? I cannot change the way the money is spent, now it’s all signed off. If I decided I wanted to I cannot close the business down and re-start with the money, once agreed and signed off by the government it is set in stone. I had to nominate a registered charity who would receive monies in the account if I close it, I chose Youth Sports Trust having worked with them during my time as an Archery GB ambassador.

So no matter what the future brings, who I might collaborate with, anyone who gives money to help fund projects is assured I will only be spending it in the manner set out.

For clarification, when talking about Integr8archery there is just me, no board or committee or staff, just me. Why do I say we? because people do work with me, each group or person who comes to me, what I provide takes more than me – there is the we. I get the most appropriate people for whatever I am helping achieve, often I am there to, but the business is me. Anyone who does paid work for my customers is paid directly by the customer. I am essentially a volunteer project manager, pulling my service suppliers and customers together and therefore dealing with most of the communication and planning.

How does this vary from the club? My club is a hybrid, open and school, and I have a committee of which I am one of 5 committee members, the committee are aware that if I am doing anything with the CIC that will impact or reflect on the club that I discuss things business related with them. The constitution has been very carefully written to reflect how we want to protect the club.

So, hopefully that has answered the majority of the questions around how we (I) have set things up. If not, feel free to ask me.

Something a little different, even though it’s a repeat!

Helen Sharpe Blog with a message, News, Re-published blogs
Grab yourself a cuppa – I usually have one under my stool 😉 thanks to the amazing people who keep me topped up!

The next few Saturdays are going to be a little different. So on a Saturday, before you sit to read my blog, make a brew ☕️🫖.

It’s easy to see what’s happening with the projects if you have been watching the website, so I thought I could explain a little more for those who don’t know me very well about the wider picture and what you get from me if you need some support instead of a project.

It’s also going to explain we are all friends at Integr8archery, because it is key to everything that happens here, in this huge family of archers who are supportive and welcoming where differences are not an issue and we embrace each others quirks.

Just in the last couple of weeks I have been approached following people reading my blogs who want support and think they may have found it amongst these pages. Last week someone new approached me on the shooting line to ask about Bert (my shooting stool), since the blog below was first published 12 people have reached out to ask me to help them through their own change. 5 of those stay in regular contact and I am blessed to call them friends. Just because you made the change doesn’t mean some days aren’t still tough and some times the words of others make us question our place on the line. On the days you need extra strength – I will always fight for your place on the line!

WHAT IF RESISTING CHANGE MEANS HAVING TO QUIT? – BY HELEN SHARPE

First published by Aim4sport on the 19th March 2021.

I signed up to my beginners’ course in January 2018, knowing at the same time that I would have a limited amount of time available to shoot because of the restrictions to my body and the pain those restrictions create. So I guessed 2 years?

Lots of issues in lots of areas and over the previous 22 years several surgeries, physios and whatever it took bit by bit to keep me going.

Being the last person in the house to pick up a bow meant that I had been around archery long enough watching what happens to know probably my best chance to shoot was with a compound bow.

So away I went, met with some resistance from those who felt that no novice should start with a compound – whatever was I suggesting!

I was lucky enough to have a coach on my beginners’ course who was happy to go with me in that starting process, so beginners course completed off we set.

So, 2 years? What could I cram into 2 years! Cram I did, shooting every day, bow in the car – office to range.

Clear advantage to living in a house of archers, if I hadn’t gotten my bow and found myself stuck at the office, I would often get a text message to tell me my bow was waiting, set up and ready to go on the shooting line, taken by my family.

I had learned over the previous 43 years to ignore the pain (not recommended in any way) and plough on.

Perfect in my mind because I wanted to compete, my plan was 4 specific local competitions in my first outdoor season – my reality? 18 competitions – including being selected to shoot for the county!

County selection surprised me, but this amazing squad have proven immensely vital in helping me face the changes that, though I anticipated, have still been surprisingly painful on an emotional level.

I love long days of competition, but they come at a cost, I cannot sit down during the day because the moment I relax I can’t move. So, a 1440 – amazing day often with great people. Walking slower as the day goes on but pushing through and often achieving more than I had hoped.

At a cost though, those closest to me would see me when it was over – and help me find my space to lay on the floor as my body seizes up and I cry – a lot – as the pain hits. Some of those friends might pour me a beer, some might cry with me, I learned later what watching someone in great pain can feel like for those around you, but that is someone else’s story.

There are no categories in archery that allow for pain, it’s incredibly difficult to quantify pain so how would you make rules that fit it? A challenge but if someone wants to pick it up and try, there are many of us who would be grateful.

I set myself a target for that first outdoor season and surpassed it.

Indoors came and a new coach, but someone who knew me and wanted to work with the issues.

Back outdoors and by now nearing 18 months and the toll was hitting – that original predicted 2 years looming and the reality that the pain was definitely becoming unbearable. My coach found himself away often due to work commitments.

So on I tried to plod alone with increasing pain.

Until the offer of a new coach arrived, one who thought we might have ways to try to get me more than 2 years in a sport that I now loved and didn’t want to give up. With a phone call he turned our team of 2 into a team of 3, a physio to add some knowledge to the situation.

Not an easy few months as those assessments and conversations happened.

When you have fought to walk and move and do everything without giving in, to have these people come into your life who think they have answers that sound in your mind like giving into those issues – it’s not easy if you are stubborn! And I might be just a little bit stubborn, possibly.

At different points it has been suggested I sit to shoot, always met by my less than polite reply to whichever brave person suggested it.

This coach however may be slightly braver than anyone else had been because despite being warned and the reaction the first time he mentioned it, he did mention it again!!

I am an evidence-based creature so to believe it was the answer regardless of what we thought we might know, I needed to see proof. So data gather started to prove what different scenarios and arrow counts would show, with sitting, standing and with or without an agent.

I am immensely grateful to those people who lived through that process with me, coach, physio and agents because quite frankly I was unbearable, and I didn’t behave well because I saw it all as giving in and letting my broken body and pain win after always fighting it.

We all survived the process – just!

The decision discussed and agreed that if I wanted to shoot I had to sit because crying as I shoot due to pain isn’t really acceptable.

Sounds simple? Nope.

You can’t walk into a store and come out with a shooting stool and to add to the issue we found ourselves in a pandemic!

My county squad mates came out as soon as possible and spent time, session after session creating what I needed and letting me rant and stomp about in the process.

So I spent the summer of 2020 learning to bond with Bert the shooting stool.

Dealing with my own head space whilst at the same time being faced with opposition from people who had opinions about if pain, regardless of how severe, should see a shooting stool allowed on the shooting line, because after all, pain is not a disability, right?

It’s a lot to get your head around but as coach keeps telling me – laying on the ground immobilised and crying in pain means giving up shooting so get sat on the stool and get on with it or quit.

Am I that resistant to change and so impacted by other people’s opinions that I never want to shoot another arrow? No.

Am I still learning to accept that I must change to carry on shooting – yes!

But I am also very blessed to have some amazing people in my corner to support that change and a coach who has most definitely become my best friend and will let me scream and shout and stomp and then tell me to quit moaning and get on with it.

So I can and I will change and learn to accept it and contend with opinions of others because I want more than 2 years, in fact I just had the 3rd anniversary of my beginners course. So maybe if faced with the option of quitting I can, in fact, be strong enough to change instead.

Some of us fight for others because we have struggled ourselves – thank you Angela Grant ❤️🏹

12 weeks!!

Helen Sharpe Blog with a message, News, Re-published blogs, weekly update
Photo credit to Malcolm Rees

As I hit my 12 weeks anniversary of Integr8archery it’s on the back of a week of volunteering with AGB and I find myself heading towards another weekend of volunteering, it drew my mind to the suggestion that I have nothing else in my life. This is a conversation that I often recall and still wonder why the person who said it believed it to be an insult?!

Which of course then leads me to the first blog I had published by Aim4sport.

Should you be interested in volunteering but are unsure where to start, please take a look at the Archery GB website

Should you be interested in the blog, please find it below, should you wish to read it:

YOU ONLY HAVE ARCHERY IN YOUR LIFE !! – HELEN SHARPE

First published by Aim4sport on the 26th February 2021

Approximately 18 months ago, as I sat amongst the parents as our children were all in their coaching session, another parent threw these words at me in anger:

“You only have archery in your life!!”

As he stood there looking at me quite obviously waiting for me to argue with him and list all the things that I do outside of archery

My reply was in fact:

“without people like me, who give back – your sport, our sport, wouldn’t function on any level!”

So yes, I am proud to say I have, outside my day job and parenting, given much of my time to my sport.

On that day I could list myself as:

  1. Archer
  2. Parent of archers
  3. Wife of an archer
  4. Club safeguarding officer, treasurer and health and safety officer.
  5. County secretary and county representative at regional meetings.
  6. Regional safeguarding officer.
  7. AGB ambassador.

I had also recently had the privilege of stepping into the county captain’s shoes to take care of the county junior squad at a competition when the county captain was away at work.

So, yes I would appear to have nothing else in my life other than archery!

Well, be honest, can you find me some spare time there for a hobby!

Those who know me well know I am incapable of sitting still with nothing to do.

What many see as a chance to chill and relax? I simply see as immensely stressful and makes me restless – often leads to mischief and trouble.

So 2020 brought a pandemic and lockdown, restrictions and furlough.

How to fill that time?

Well I started, along with a lot of the nation, by trying to work in the garden, it’s seriously neglected ordinarily as we concentrate on shooting those arrows.

This was however short lived when I stuck my leg on a tree and found myself with a hole in my leg!

So what to do now I have no work or shooting?

Lockdown 3 has also found me being approached by people new to furlough asking this whilst the range is closed and they have no access to the shooting that helps with their mental health.

I stumbled across studying, haven’t done any for a while so decided to see what might help in that list of roles whilst I was injured, furloughed and the ranges were closed.

Nearly 12 months on I have now completed 3 level 2 courses around mental health and safeguarding related topics along with some other shorter courses.

May 2020 saw the opening of ranges under restrictions, many people on the committee and coaches were on the shielding lists so with the help of 3 willing volunteers I took on the task of getting the club open, which was made easier by the many webinars and sessions related to archery and multi sports that I had sat in on since early April.

As we have rolled from lockdown, restrictions and tiers this has been my focus to allow anyone who wants to shoot the chance to be able to shoot. Our sport ticks so many boxes but in strange times many want that time on the range to help with their mental health.

I have worked with the NGB to get disabled archers back on the field last summer, when they do not have an agent in their household.

Now in lockdown 3 I am agent for an archer who is able to shoot under the disability exemption.

I am constantly in webinars, training sessions and meetings in our sport or across other sports working together to keep grassroots going.

Do I only have archery in my life? Probably, is it an insult? – never. I will work to allow people to enjoy my sport, our sport because I love it and all that it can give.

Would I recommend you give as many hours as I do to volunteer – no!!

Would I recommend you find a way to volunteer even a couple of hours a year?

Absolutely, because in my opinion, you will get something back if you give even a little.

With respect and thanks

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It has been a strange day today, I think we all knew what news was going to break as the day wore on. For me the significant thing, whilst also small for many, was early in the day when the BBC newsreaders had all changed to black ties. This was not simply just news that the queen was unwell.

The breaking news this evening that our Queen had died was sad but not unexpected. A lady who has lived a life of service to the public, a nation, the commonwealth.

I am not interested in a debate around the monarchy.

I am interested in if the media will respect a family who have lost a beloved member.


In the coming days we will live through history, see things many of us never have, state mourning, a state funeral, a coronation.

I shall choose to remember a graceful lady who served us with calm and dignity regardless of how stormy the world was around her. Whose family speak of her with love and fondness and who showed us her cheeky sense of humour, the James Bond scene for the 2012 Olympics, the Paddington Bear scene for the jubilee.

Rest In Peace and thank you for your service.

9 weeks! Let’s get some things straight and then move forward without the questions 🙂

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So – 9 weeks in!

After 6 years of working on so many things at grassroots level I truly felt I had lost everything and had no choice but to step away from my sport, the sport which I am truly passionate about.

I have given 20-30 hours a week consistently for a good 4 years volunteering in so many ways.

But when I fell apart yet again on a range on the 27/6/22 it was in the company of someone different. Someone who knew the whole messy story and had a different way of dealing with what was happening to me.

I am incredibly grateful to those few people who had helped me get through every day before that. Literally helping me to breathe most days since 29/12/21.

But 27/6/22 was different, maybe a combination of things, but after a very specific brand of talking to I drove home with a lot to think about, driving time is always when I churn through thoughts, added to the fact, I don’t sleep – and I certainly didn’t that night!!!

I woke up with a determination of what I wanted to achieve, that maybe, just maybe, I do have something to offer.

19 projects, between me and my best friend! Collaborating on each other’s work and also creating new work together for over 3 years. Using my links to bring Aim4sport and Archery GB together as I continued my projects under my role as ambassador.

But the mess I was in had created issues within those collaborations.

In July with a serious breakdown in communication all round, I signed over all of my rights to a number of projects, regardless of who started them or of how passionate I might be of my work or it’s aims. Moving forward under my new brand with the 8 I have kept but hopeful that as no communication was causing issues, with me stepping away, the ones I handed over could fly without me. Sad? terribly, and I had so much still to give on them, but I believed it was the best decision at the time.

I am repeatedly asked what’s happening with work that I had passionately discussed with people. The plans I had described for evolution and roll out from May to October.

Simply this, Aim4sport is not and never was mine. Whilst I do still belong to Aim4sport Archery Club, I have had to make the very sad decision to leave as it is necessary that I can satellite the children from my projects and this was no longer going to be possible under A4SAC.

So, my company is now a community interest company, a social enterprise as was always planned. There is a lot going on for those 8 projects that I have kept.

Recent conversations with Archery GB are seeing the communication get back on track and things moving forward to help me.

Should my best friend reach out, there is much I had planned for the work that I handed over and collaboration between the 2 brands could work. If not, then I genuinely hope that he succeeds and that is all I shall ever say, so please do stop asking for my opinions.

For now, I am working hard on the schools I have on board, the many I am working to get up and running by autumn. The re-estabilshment of archery in a local disability group. Work with a local group who provide access to sports for the deaf community. Return to shooting for the out of school setting educated children. Several new collaborations and a bunch of new groups, not least a possible huge Project Rimaya development.

So thank you to everyone who has kept me going in the last 9 months, those who have helped since I made the middle of the night decision that the best way forward to protect my work was to create a business!! I know there’s a small group of amazing people who woke up that Tuesday morning 9 weeks ago to find a couple of crazy messages asking for help – and I shall never take for granted that they stepped up.

And of course, thank you to my small but amazing committee who have stepped up to join me in creating a new archery club in the joined belief that we can help amazing children achieve great things.

All of these people surely share my believe that we can change lives through archery.

A little bit different as we head towards week 6

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This mid week post is a little different and it’s not often this kind of post will occur but it is my website and I think it’s important to remember some things.

Though I started volunteering at the age of 16 it wasn’t until I was 21 that I made a promise to myself that if I came through an horrifying event, that I would spend my life trying to make a difference in some way.

As I was experiencing my own trauma I recalled two years earlier sitting at work early in my civil service career, listening to the mother of Suzy Lamplugh talk to us about the importance of keeping ourself safe and thinking how I had let her down.

It is the 35th anniversary of the disappearance of Suzy and her parents used their experience to help others by creating the Suzy Lamplugh Trust . This was my first real awareness that some people use terrible events to create something positive . Something I always stand in awe of.

If you have read the pages of my website you will have seen my page regarding knife crime and the national anti violence campaign . How I recently joined off the street in their march, our starting point was the location where the most recent fatal stabbing had occurred just last year. I was privileged to meet Dylan’s family and also other families who have suffered tragedy through senseless acts of violence. This week saw the conclusion of the trial into Dylan’s death and I am painfully reminded that we need to do more to give our young people an alternative place to belong than gangs – that place could be in sport .

So as I sit here worrying about if I am good enough to do my bit to make a difference – it’s ok to be a little bit scared and excited about my new path and the achievements both small and large .

I am again thankful to those who are like minded and want to make a difference too and whether we can work together or simply support each other to achieve our aims then this week has surely reminded me of why we are trying .